We’re almost to the end of the 12 Days of Self Care countdown and I can’t tell you how excited I am about today’s topic. It may seem a bit out of the realm of self care, but it truly is an important piece of self care – especially for women. This essential piece can be found in the form of great friends and today, we’ll be talking about two friends you definitely need in your life.
I have had many friends over the years. I grew up in a military community and returned to the military community after marriage. This has resulted in a lot of friendships over the years. Some have been sticky and lasted for years on end, while others were a passing thing. Even the passerby friendships have made an impact on my life and were needed during different seasons. In fact, some of these passerby friendships have shaped me the most.
I’m getting off topic though. This post is about friendship, but it’s not about how long a friend sticks around in your life. It’s about the qualities that friends bring to the friendship and how they can help you with your self care. This isn’t about being selfish – in fact, your friendship is likely helping your friend with her self care as well. Simply put, good friends can take a bad day and turn it around simply by being a friend. There are two types of friends that do this the best and they go about it in two very different ways.
Listener
The first friend you need is a listener – someone you can go to when you need to talk or vent about something that happened during your day. They are all ears and willing to listen to your problems before giving any suggestions (if they give suggestions at all). This is the girlfriend that you’ll turn to when your world is turned upside down and you need a listening ear and arms to hug you.
Listeners make great friends in a tough spot. They give you an outlet to share your thoughts without any judgement. This is important when it comes to handling those tough situations. Otherwise, the emotions build up inside of us until we’re ready to explode.
I have several friends that I can turn to when I need to share my thoughts. In fact, there have been many times when I’ve gone to a friend to share a problem. I often find that after one listening session, I am able to let go and move on from the problem. In fact, more times than not, my problems aren’t as big as they seem and simply saying them out loud can make me aware of that little fact.
Take a moment and think. Do you have a listener in your life? Are you the listening friend for someone in your life?
Doer
The second friend you need in your life is a doer – someone who will take action and get your mind off of the things that plague it. While it’s nice to have someone that will listen to your problems, there are also times when you need someone to take your mind off of your problem. This is where the doer comes in.
This is the friend that you can go to when you need a distraction from your problems. She’s always full of ideas and willing to try just about anything. While she may be a good listener, her strength truly lies in getting your mind off of the problem. She’s the perfect person when you need a distraction.
I have had several friends like this over the course of my years. In my early twenties, I had a friend that I could call on when I needed a distraction. All I had to do was briefly tell her the problem and then let her know that I wanted to have a girls night out. In no time flat, we’d have a fun outing planned that was guaranteed to take my mind off of whatever was bothering me.
I want to include one important note about doers – they can also be great listeners. Their skills are just better in distraction. Do you have a doer in your life?
These are just two types of friends that I think every girl should have. A good friend can make a world of difference in your mood and life. Cherish them and shower them with love whenever you can.
Do you have a close friend that you turn to when life gets rough? I’d love to hear about her in the comments below!
